I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Be still, my beating vagina.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Randomize
