I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Randomize
