Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
