I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
