The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
