i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
So gin and wine won't be happening again
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
