Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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