just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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