Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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