I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
