pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Randomize