All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
