Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
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