it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
