I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
