The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
