dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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