His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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