Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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