"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize