that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
