He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize