i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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