i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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