If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
