can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
we're so committed to being not committed
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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