i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
