Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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