Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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