I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
