I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
