And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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