I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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