What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
