I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
