bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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