so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize