It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
