people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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