Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Randomize
