Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
