He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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