And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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