I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
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