I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
