how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
