Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
They took my balls.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
