a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
