Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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