Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
